Is Life Really Happening To Us?


Is life really happening to you? Do you feel that life throws curve balls at you or perhaps you are in a constant state of playing dodge ball? Do you ask yourself why me and why now? Perhaps if you just turned that thought around and told yourself that life practice is not something that is thrown at us, but rather mini lessons put in front of us to learn, grow and succeed as we move forward. Many times, we have a plan for the day all laid out and we are ready get through the day feeling accomplished when we check off all the boxes. Sometimes, plans don’t go smoothly as we perceived, and we get stuck or diverted thus having to go off track and deal with these changes. Or maybe you have shiny object syndrome, and you get diverted from your path and work on something else. Whatever the hiccup in your plans may be, when you don’t feel like you have accomplished all the things you planned to do, you may feel like a hamster in a cage running on a wheel to nowhere.

So why do we think that life happens to us? Rather we should see it in a different way. Instead of thinking and feeling that we are victim of life, think that life events happen in our favor or life happens for us. Look at each moment that unravels as an opportunity to learn from. Whether that event is a success or failure either way we learn. A success teaches us that we should continue in moving in that direction in that same pattern and a failure teaches us that we should try a different method for the next time.

A fun way to move through your day with an open mind is considering that life is a party, and everyone involved in it is part of the party. Have fun while you attend your daily life party. Some days can even be a surprise party with the surprises being those so-called curve balls that change your direction or plan for the day. So, my point is if you like parties and especially surprise parties then you should enjoy life to the fullest no matter what, how or who shows up to it. All the people and things in your life party are there for you to embrace and enjoy every moment. Just like parties happen and come to an end so does life practice. I encourage you to really embrace every moment you are gifted whether they are tough or easy. We learn from day-to-day moments and move forward as we learn from our mistakes, failures, and our victories

Ah, but some of you say you don’t like parties and especially surprise parties. So perhaps using the analogy of life being a game. When you are playing a game with a team you must all collaborate and create a plan on how you will work together to win. Each part of your team has a responsibility and just like that you have a responsibility in the game of life to support all of those around you. As you and your team are playing the game you will have a plan mapped out on how to prevail and score over the other team. However, as we know the prepared play may not go exactly as planned and you must be able to make a compromise and think quick to get back on track. So, if we are okay to make changes and compromise when playing a game why not have the same attitude when playing the game of life?

A personal example is when I have had a completely booked schedule with no wiggle room for any hiccups. I often would wonder and even begin to worry how in the world am I going to even get through this day? When I notice that I am expending energy to worry-thus wasting more time- I stop and think to myself that everything is going to work out in the end. When I just get myself to believe that one phrase it helps calm me down and allows me to just pay attention to one thing at a time and not worry of any surprises or hiccups that come along the way. So, what if any surprises come my way? I will welcome them with open arms and count them as a lesson and challenge to my patience and state of being nonreactive. Surprises and hiccups in life are lessons in teaching us on how to be flexible, patient, and nonreactive. I have noticed that these curve balls in life happen for me. They are a blessing to teach me to be flexible in all aspects of life. Things happen all the time and rather than expending the energy on being upset and worrisome I embrace the opportunity and look at things in a different and positive way.

This year when we went down to the University of Miami to help our younger son move into his off-campus apartment, we traveled to Florida via the auto train. We loaded up our SUV with things he needed in the apartment and onto the train and traveled in style in the sleeper cars of the train. We planned this out thinking this would be easier for us to carry a load down there and back and not have to drive 1200 miles. We also took the opportunity of going down there to stay a few extra days to lounge on the beach and enjoy Miami life. The day before we were to board the auto train, we were setting ourselves up under our cabana on the beautiful Miami beach. Then wouldn’t you know it? Or maybe not because we didn’t see it coming either… my husband got an alert on his phone saying that a freight train derailed on the same tracks that our train was supposed to travel on, so all passenger trains were cancelled until further notice. We then just sat there basking in the sun thinking holy smokes we are going to have to drive 1200 miles back home! Honestly, I did kind of sulk for a moment or let me be real, maybe a few moments. But, instead of stressing about a 2-day road trip with yet again full SUV of my son’s things to take back home, I literally let it go in my mind and just accepted what was to come. I allowed myself to enjoy the next 2 days of driving home by enjoying the long conversations with my husband, enjoying the scenes we passed through in each state and even nerded out a bit and looked up the history of the places we passed and stayed in. Honestly, the trip back was not as bad as I initially perceived when we got the cancellation news because I allowed myself to release the disappointment and stress quickly and enjoyed the rest of the day on the beach before we headed home.

So, the bottom line is to let go of things you have no control over and use the energy you have on things you do. You have the control of how you perceive life surprises and how you will move forward when they come at you. Let life happen and let it happen for you. After all life is one big party if you like parties or life is a fun game if you like to play. Enjoy every moment and embrace what life has to offer you.



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